People come to meditation and the Buddha’s teachings for a number of reasons. Many of them involve suffering. A recent death, some disruption, illness - one’s own or that of a close family member or friend. And the overarching desire is for peace, for a sense of calm and ease, to be free of the clamorous voices of need, of want, or inadequacy when we can’t satisfy those needs or wants for ourselves or for others, when we can’t prevent the inevitable, when we can’t stop the suffering.
Breath awareness practice is often the first practice we learn - the gentle awareness of breath entering the body, breath leaving the body. Bringing the mind back from its wanderings to rest on this moment’s breath, this experience of breathing in and breathing out. And we might learn to add a single word to keep our minds focused. In. Out. Rising. Falling. Budd—ho. We might learn to sense how we breathe in new life on the in breath, let go a little more on the out breath. We begin to feel this rhythm - breathing in air, life, energy, and breathing out tension, holding, suffering, just letting go, relaxing, allowing, letting be.
And our bodies relax, our minds begin to let go, the misery and suffering begins to seep out of us. We begin to feel peaceful, tranquil, serene.
These past few weeks we have been exploring the first of the four foundations of mindfulness as taught in the Sattipathana Sutta. And Indeed, mindfulness of breathing was the very first practice. In conjunction with that, the Buddha taught mindfulness of the body in all the postures - sitting, standing, walking and lying down, and in all activities throughout the day - getting up from a chair, washing the dishes, dressing, walking to the car, driving. Any activity we engage is can be mindfully held in awareness.
The next three practices in that foundational teaching of the Buddha have been a bit more challenging - mindfulness of the anatomical parts with an eye to their lack of beauty so that we don’t idealize the body and get lost in our own fantasies about it, mindfulness of the elements which helps us see how our bodies are made of matter symbolized by earth, water, fire, and wind just like all matter everywhere with the reminder that each of these qualities of matter is empty of a solid self directing the body and mind, is impersonal and is not entirely under our control. The third practice which we will take up later is mindfulness of the body in death - the process of disintegration after death and a practice which reminds us that our bodies are impermanent, death is inevitable for all living beings.
These, especially the last, are challenging as noted above. The Buddha wanted to wake up his students to the realization of the impermanence of life and how it applies to all of us. He knew that we shield ourselves from our own inevitable ending with two main ideas - not me and not yet. Both are powerful defenses against what we intellectually know to be true. But the Buddha also wanted these contemplations to be done from the serenity of the mindfulness of breathing practice. With this serenity as the base, the meditator would be able to loosen the bindings of desire and aversion, ownership and appropriation, and gain freedom from the weight of those delusions.
Nevertheless, those contemplations can be disturbing. A sudden insight into the body as made up of skin, flesh and bones can be disorienting until we get more acclimated to seeing the body as it is. Clear seeing. We might lose our sense of calm and composure for a time, however, feeling unsettled or restless. This is a normal part of the process.
The practice is never straight-forward, unfolding in a straight line. Tranquillity found is not to be owned or kept. It is impermanent like the breath - coming and going. We might have periods of calm where insights and revelations unfold. Those may be followed by periods of confusion and suffering, doubt about ourselves, our teachers, and our practice. I’ve heard it said that the periods of calm are islands of purity which prepare us to dive a little deeper into the sources of ignorance within us, to swim in the depths, and eventually come to the surface a little lighter and freer for having done so.
So it’s important to think about balance in our practice. If we have engaged in the elements practice and are feeling out of sorts, disturbed, it might be useful to return to the mindfulness of breathing practice for a period. Or we might engage in a compassionate body scan such as that of Christopher Germer’s body scan. https://chrisgermer.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/Compassionate-Body-Scan-Germer.m4a Perhaps some loving kindness practice or hand over the heart compassion practice would soothe our minds and spirits.
Tonight we’ll explore balance in practice - how do we recognize we are out of balance, can we allow that out of balance-ness to be? Do we try to push away the disturbing thoughts and feelings or can we turn towards them? What practice will help restore our balance without judging ourselves for being out of balance in the first place?
These disturbances themselves are not in our control. We may feel responsible for them and as if we failed as a meditator for being out of balance at all, but it is helpful to know that these disturbances themselves are empty of a solid sense of self. We did not will the disturbances into being and we can’t will them into not being. But we can gently incline the mind towards peaceful practices of mindfulness and compassion.
Today I am drawing on Thich Nath Hanh for re-inspiration around breath awareness and mindfulness of breathing. In my early days, I practiced exclusively with his gatas - verses of mindfulnesses especially the one he writes about below:
Breathing in, I calm my body. Breathing out, I smile.
Dwelling in the present moment, I know this is a wonderful moment!
I found remembering that practice and hearing his words on mindful breathing brought me back to the serenity of breath awareness practice. The peacefulness in his heart comes through in these passages below and may remind us of the peacefulness we all wish for ourselves and each other.
Mindful Breathing
Mindfulness is always mindfulness of something. In Plum Village, mindfulness practice begins with mindfulness of our breath and our steps. It is very simple, but very deep.
As we breathe in, we simply become aware that we are breathing in, and as we breathe out, we become aware that we are breathing out. It can be very relaxing and pleasant to follow our breathing flow naturally in and out of our body. We may choose to follow our breathing at our belly or at our nostrils. As the air enters our body, we can feel it refreshing every cell. And as the air leaves our body, we can gently relax any tension we find.
Following our in-breath and out-breath brings us back to the present moment. We arrive in our body in the here and the now.
Our breathing is a stable solid ground that is always there for us to take refuge in. Whenever we are carried away by regret about something that has happened, or swept away in our fears or anxiety in the future, we can return to our breathing, and re-establish ourselves in the present moment.
We don’t need to control the breath in any way. We simply encounter it, just as it is. It may be long or short, deep or shallow. With the gentle energy of mindfulness it will naturally become slower and deeper.
Conscious Breathing
There are a number of breathing techniques you can use to make life vivid and more enjoyable. The first exercise is very simple. As you breathe in, you say to yourself, “Breathing in, I know that I am breathing in.” And as you breathe out, say, “Breathing out, I know that I am breathing out.” Just that. You recognize your in-breath as an in-breath and your out-breath as an out-breath. You don’t even need to recite the whole sentence; you can use just two words: “In” and “Out.” This technique can help you keep your mind on your breath. As you practice, your breath will become peaceful and gentle, and your mind and body will also become peaceful and gentle. This is not a difficult exercise. In just a few minutes you can realize the fruit of meditation.
Breathing in and out is very important, and it is enjoyable. Our breathing is the link between our body and our mind. Sometimes our mind is thinking of one thing and our body is doing another, and mind and body are not unified. By concentrating on our breathing, “In” and “Out,” we bring body and mind back together, and become whole again. Conscious breathing is an important bridge.
To me, breathing is a joy that I cannot miss. Every day, I practice conscious breathing, and in my small meditation room, I have calligraphed this sentence: “Breathe, you are alive!” Just breathing and smiling can make us very happy, because when we breathe consciously we recover ourselves completely and encounter life in the present moment.
Present Moment, Wonderful Moment
In our busy society, it is a great fortune to breathe consciously from time to time. We can practice conscious breathing not only while sitting in a meditation room, but also while working at the office or at home, while driving our car, or sitting on a bus, wherever we are, at any time throughout the day. There are so many exercises we can do to help us breathe consciously. Besides the simple “In-Out” exercise, we can recite these four lines silently as we breathe in and out:
Breathing in, I calm my body. Breathing out, I smile.
Dwelling in the present moment, I know this is a wonderful moment!
“Breathing in, I calm my body.” Reciting this line is like drinking a glass of cool lemonade on a hot day—you can feel the coolness permeate your body. When I breathe in and recite this line, I actually feel my breath calming my body and mind.
“Breathing out, I smile.” You know a smile can relax hundreds of muscles in your face. Wearing a smile on your face is a sign that you are master of yourself.
“Dwelling in the present moment.” While I sit here, I don’t think of anything else. I sit here, and I know exactly where I am.
“I know this is a wonderful moment.” It is a joy to sit, stable and at ease, and return to our breathing, our smiling, our true nature. Our appointment with life is in the present moment. If we do not have peace and joy right now, when will we have peace and joy—tomorrow, or after tomorrow? What is preventing us from being happy right now? As we follow our breathing, we can say, simply, “Calming, Smiling, Present moment, Wonderful moment.”
This exercise is not just for beginners. Many of us who have practiced meditation and conscious breathing for forty or fifty years continue to practice in this same way, because this kind of exercise is so important and so easy.
Hanh, T. N. (1995). Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life. Random House. (pp. 8-9)